In my head I have already stopped. I cannot think of anything to say. Everything is too much and everything is too little. To much rhetoric; to many voices raised in frustration and loneliness; to many loud naysayers and whore mongers; too much pain; to little time to spend wondering about what went right and what went wrong. The inspirational voices state to live each day. They are wrong; so very wrong. We must live each second in the now for that is all that we have. Space debris may fall on our head at any moment; lightning may strike out of the blue; and the tree may fall on your house like one fell on mine crashing into the den four feet from where I was sitting. My big Samoyed sat beside me therefore all the glass went into his shaggy coat so he took the glass for me; his paws became bloody and 20K later I had a house again. There was no warning; there was no warning when 5 different times someone ran into the rear of my car and “they” called me “accident prone”…I was stopped at a red traffic light…so I would think that if I ran the light I would be “accident prone”…I am in back to back traffic and the car behind brakes malfunctions and strikes our car 3 times…so I made the brakes malfunction; we are going to a fourth of July party with a food tray in lap and the car crosses two lanes of traffic, jumps the meridian and we run into him and this is my fault? I am waiting to pull into traffic from a side road and someone again runs into the rear…and this was not the end.,..I was at work; parked my car in the paid parking space…car barrels out of control, runs a red light and lands in the middle of my brand new car demolishing same….car is lifted off my car and they drive away. I am left with no car and two years later I get $62. In the meantime, I get to buy another car. I am accident prone. Saying all this reminds me that there is nothing that can change these past events and planning for a future that may not be there seems useless. Some may say you cannot drift aimlessly and I agree, however, one can set sail on life’s journey with the plan of not having a plan. It is like no answer is an answer.
Your blogs are wonderful and I will read them and click that “like” button so you will know I was there but for now that is all I can manage. I am overwhelmed by all the things that have happened in the last week.